The Darkest Woods, The Longest Night.

In between reality and dreams and memories
I can put my conscious there
A world of no higher power than that of love

You are always there
The forest is endless and godless
Not free of a god but as if it isn’t not needed

These are not visions, but dreaming while awake
Akin to memories
As if I can put my body and mind there
The emotions I feel there are as real, if not more than the emotions I feel writing this

I wonder if it is a dream
I wonder if it is heaven
I wonder if I am insane

It is an endless forest
A limbo ordered by chaos and a quiet, dark serenity

You are not there by my own merit
As a dream is not directly controlled
When I’m there, you are

If I concentrate and focus on blurring memories and dreams I can visit

My entire being is enveloped in pure love
That is why I wonder if it is heaven

I once was both there and in our shared reality
But I was alone
On the trail in the early dawn, I became aware that the dream, memory, and reality were one.
But you were not there
If it was a dream I willed you there, but I remained alone

I questioned if I had died
For hours I assumed I had and was wondering the afterlife looking for you for eternity
I wondered if it was perhaps hell

I can go there now

It is always dark but we never struggle to see
Cold but we are warm
Silent but we are lively without words

I wonder if I go there a year from now
If you’ll be there, or if my mind will have abandoned you
And I’ll be alone

If not, I will know it was only a dream.

The first time I went there was by accident
I had a memory, or a dream, or a memory, or a dream
An image, a feeling, an experience I cannot place

I’m in a car with you
There is a road and a turn
There’s a body of water under a bridge we drive across
And a dog

The dog was like a brick wall for my mind. An error in the code. It couldn’t categorize the experience
Where was I? Who was I with? When was this?

One moment I’m convinced it’s real
The next I know it was a dream
One-half is too real and the other too surreal

When my brain couldn’t process the correct emotions it snapped
I was in an eternal forest
And there you were

What’s so strange is the reality you’re using to read this can so easily be a memory
Sometimes when I’m sitting or at work, it happens
My reality becomes mixed with a dream

I see through fallacies
The world gets dark

If I let myself go there the feelings are so warm
It’s like being in love with the universe

I recite a poem or quote and my mind comes back to reality
I’m scared I won’t be able to snap out of it one day

That one day I will be too happy and never return.

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